Archive for the ‘Spontaneous Emissions’ Category

Spontaneous Emissions: Wed, Nov. 2, Sunnyvale

It’s the Bay Area Science Festival!  Get your geek on!  From the lighter side of helium to the darker side of the moon, join science comedian Brian Malow on a rocket ride through the humorverse.  Brian will dispel myths & misconceptions about science, explore the science in science fiction films, and exercise your brain as well as your funny bone.  Also, appearing:  special guest Norm Goldblatt.

For all audiences!  Music is not just for musicians. Art is not just for artists. And science is not just for scientists.

8pm, Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Rooster T. Feather’s Comedy Club
157 W. El Camino Real
Sunnyvale, CA  94087
408-736-0921

For more info and tickets:
http://www.bayareascience.org/11/02/spontaneous-emissions-an-evening-of-science-humor/

 “It’s as much about expanding the mind as it is tickling the funny bone.”
– The Washington Times

Brian Malow is Earth’s Premier Science Comedian (available for off-world appearances if transportation is provided). Based in San Francisco, Brian has appeared on “The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson,” and performed for NASA, JPL, NIST, OSA, ACS, and other acronyms. He also makes science videos for Time Magazine’s website, and is a contributor to Neil de Grasse Tyson’s radio show.  Brian has been featured in the Washington Post, New York Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and San Jose Mercury News.

For more info, check out:
www.sciencecomedian.com
www.youtube.com/sciencecomedian
www.twitter.com/sciencecomedian

 

My 25 Mundane Neutrino Explanations

Today I had the most fun I’ve ever had on Twitter, thanks to the OPERA experiment working out of CERN, home of the Large Hadron Collider.

The blogosphere is ablaze with news that they seem to have detected neutrinos traveling faster than light.  If true, it would be the biggest science news of the century, overturning one of the most fundamental concepts in physics.  There is obviously much skepticism amongst scientists.  For a typically insightful explanation, check out Bad Astronomer Phil Plait‘s post:  Faster-than-light travel discovered? Slow down, folks

The Twitter fun began when a discussion between two physicist/mathematician-types, Blake Stacey (@blakestacey) and S.C. Kavassalis (@sc_k) led Blake to tweet:

@sc_k Maybe we need to counterbalance the HEP blogohedron with a Twitter meme? e.g., #mundaneneutrinoexplanations

Then he spun out a few funny examples of more mundane explanations for the unusual neutrino measurement:

  • #CERN physicists did arithmetic on old Pentium computers
  • #CERN physicists let undergrads near the experiment
  • Calculations done by visiting Americans who still don’t get the metric system.

…  all with the #mundaneneutrinoexplanations hashtag appended.

I think I was the first one to follow his lead with:

  • Forgot to carry the one
  • Confused neutrino with one sent later
  • Study published by Wakefield et al

Then @drskyskull and @physicsdavid and others joined in (even astophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson and the Bad Astronomer) and, before you know it, the Twitterverse was alive with funny explanations, some of which may be as likely as superluminal neutrinos.  I ended up spitting out about 25 of them, which I present here, as they were tweeted, in reverse chronological order (so start from the bottom).  Enjoy!

 

#mundaneneutrinoexplanations

 

Upcoming San Francisco Shows

Science Comedian Street Team: Activate!  Please forward via email, Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, telegraph, semaphore, smoke signals, and telepathy.

I have two(2) big San Francisco shows coming up – plus, a bonus appearance at Ignite SF.  One show is this week, part of SF Sketchfest – the others are just around the corner:  February 8 and 9.  Details and links… to more details and links:

This Wednesday, January 26, see two one-man shows for the price of one.  At the Eureka Theatre, comedian and cartoonist Michael Capozzola will present his food-themed multimedia show “Regurgitated,” and I’ll be doing my latest science comedy: “Spontaneous Emissions.”  Joining us will be the amazing Mike Meehan for a special cameo.

Wednesday, February 9, join me at the San Francisco Punch Line Comedy Club for an evening of science humor – again, “Spontaneous Emissions.”  My good friend Ngaio Bealum will join me as a guest performer.  Call the club and make reservations in advance!  This show will sell out.

And for something a little different…  the 2nd Annual Global Ignite Week is coming.  I’ll be participating in the San Francisco event at Public Works on Tuesday, February 8.  Ignite is an evening of 5-minute talks with 20 slides each, that auto-advance every 15 seconds.  Presentations are by artists, technologists, and other thinkers – designed to be of interest to geeks.  16 speakers!  A huge variety of topics.  My presentation will be called “How Wine Saved the World.”  True story.  Be there!

And, seriously – even if you’re not in the SF Bay Area, please forward this link to someone who is!  Thanks!

Why is Science Important?

Alom Shaha has made a wonderful 28-minute film entitled “Why is Science Important?”

Shaha is a physics teacher at an inner city school in the UK, and also a TV producer who specializes in science programs.  The film was made to be broadcast on Teachers TV (a UK cable channel) but it’s also available online in excellent HD quality – and can even be shared and embedded, as seen below (you can view a larger size if you click over to his site).

The website also contains “a collection of thoughts from leading scientists, public figures …and you.”  Add your thoughts on why science is important and they’ll appear alongside the thoughts of Bad Astronomer Phil Plait, SETI’s Seth Shostak, LabLit’s Jennifer Rohn, and many others.

Visit Alom’s YouTube Channel – sciencefilms – to see more answers to the question “Why is Science Important?” as well as some of his other films.

Links:
Why is Science Important?
Bad Astronomy blog
SETI
Seth Shostak
LabLit

Unluckily, it can be a genuine catastrophe for the mark you get in an examination. good essay writing companies impersonation of Dickenss idiom Our editors and writers will pee any requisite rewrite and broadcast it to you in 3 years or less

Year of Science – Nobel, Edison and the Speed of Light

A second video for the COPUS Project’s Year of Science and the March theme of Physics and Technology.  A few thoughts on…

Alfred Nobel, who funded the Nobel Prize with the fortune he made from his invention of dynamite, the first relatively stable and safely-usable form of nitroglycerin.

Thomas Edison, who perfected the incandescent light bulb – and, with the phonograph and movie projector, damn near invented modern entertainment.  We should all give thanks!

And, then, one of my classical, if not “classic,” physics routines about the speed of light…

Related posts:
Year of Science, March: JetBlue and Cell Phones
Year of Science, February:  Stand Up For Evolution
Year of Science, January:  Why is the Sky Blue?

Year of Science – JetBlue and Cell Phones

In conjunction with the COPUS Project’s Year of Science – and the March theme of Physics and Technology – I offer up a bit of humor on bad website usability on the Jet Blue website and also a couple thoughts on cell phones – loud users and shrinking sizes.

Do you think we’ll live to see implantable cell phones?…  or the end of obnoxiously loud cell phone talkers?  When will they realize that technology is here to relieve the strain on their voices?

Unconvincing Spam

Some phishing attempts are better – more honorable – than others.  They might be HTML, for instance, and carefully mimic the look of an actual email from the particular bank or business they’re spoofing.  They are evil, no question – but at least they have the respect to make a decent effort to hoodwink you.

There’s something especially insulting and infuriating about the much more common spam we get – the unconvincing spam:  plain text, ugly formatting, misspelled words, terrible writing, apparent lack of familiarity with the language they’re written in – in short, embarrassingly poor execution.

Sometimes I’m so offended by their apparent lack of respect and effort that I’m nearly tempted to reply.  Nearly, but not quite.

Here’s one I just got…

First of all, it’s simply from “Support.”  Then the subject line is misspelled and has a dash that leads nowhere – a dash in-between nothing…

Subject:  Messge from eBay –

Inside, I find one block of pathetic plain text that says…

Dear eBay Member,
This is your official notification from eBay. Your online has expired.
If you want to continue using our service you have to renew your online.
If not, your online will be limited and deleted.
To confirm your Account records click on the following link:

The link, of course, is scary-looking with the word “ebay” sprinkled through it three times – but not in the one place you want to see it.  And then it is signed…

Thank you,
Scott R. Shipman, CIPP Senior Counsel, Global Privacy Practices eBay Inc.

My online has expired??!!  My online will be limited and deleted??!!

“Scott R. Shipman,” you dishonor me with your pitiful lack of effort.  You call that a lure?  You are a poor excuse for a phisherman. essay help online

Stand up straight!

My mother used to tell me to “stand up straight.”

It was one of her favorite things to say: “Stand up straight!”

Many other people, I have discovered, also grew up hearing that phrase. It’s nearly universal. As if mothers were programmed to say it. In fact, I believe mothers have been telling their children to “stand up straight” longer than we realize. Perhaps even to pre-human days.

What if that were the driving force behind the evolutionary trend to walk erect?

Mothers nagging their children up the evolutionary ladder:

“Stand up straight!
“Don’t drag your knuckles when you walk!
“What’re ya born in a tree?
“You want the other families to think we’re not evolving?”

“No, mom…”

Then: “How many times do I have to tell you?”

And, therein lies the origin of mathematics:

“How many times?…well, if I put the three here and carry the one….”

Conservation of Mass

I noticed a long time ago, whenever my mother would lose weight, my father would gain weight. And when my father lost weight, my mother gained weight.

It was like the Conservation of Mass, within our family.

Being the young scientist that I was, I developed a theory to explain the facts: You see, you never actually lose weight….you just give it to somebody else.

Fat can be neither created nor destroyed. It’s one of the basic laws of the universe. You need to know the laws if you’re gonna live here.

Why is the sky blue?

Once, when I was maybe ten years old, I asked my dad, “Why is the sky blue?”

A pretty reasonable question for a little ten-year-old scientist. But he wasn’t in the mood.

He said, “Go ask your mother.”

And I thought: Great, she knows.

I turned from my dad, and headed toward the kitchen, knowing I was one step closer to having my answer.

And as I rounded the corner, I was experiencing the thrill of the Scientific Method. I was following in the footsteps of Galileo and Isaac Newton.

And, to a certain degree, I was correct. I was, indeed, one step closer to my answer. Not the answer, but an answer.

There she stood. I took a deep breath, and asked her, “Mom, why is the sky blue?”

And I’ll never forget her response:

“Because I said so.”

At first, I was in awe of my mother. Later, I learned not to trust her in matters of science.

(The real reason the sky is blue has to do with light scattering by oxygen and nitrogen molecules. The Usenet Physics FAQ of UC Riverside has a good explanation – including the role Albert Einstein played in proving it was the air molecules themselves that were responsible and not particles of dust or droplets of water vapor suspended in the air)